People are sweet and well-meaning. Most of them, anyway. But sometimes they drive me fucking crazy.
Mike and I are in the process of registering for baby stuff. That's been a process in and of itself, because we each have our own ideas about how it should go. But we are finally mostly on the same page about most things and it's been getting easier. It was, anyway, until a little bit ago.
Last night, Mike was IMing with a friend who has a couple of kids and he mentioned to her that he was working on our registry. She then came up with this list of things to get and to not get, and of course has opinions on everything. Mike ate it up hook, line and sinker. (Now that I know this, it actually helps explain how/why some things got on our registry that we'd never talked about and that I am quite sure we don't need and won't use.)
The big thing he took from her is that rather than getting the Medela Pump in Style (PIS) breast pump that I want, that I should get some single (only one breast at a time) hand pump because it's less expensive and it's quiet and it will make me feel less like a cow. I tried to explain to Mike that I talked to people and read books and did research and that's how I decided that I wanted the PIS and that it's not like I just picked the more expensive one because it's more expensive (A LOT more expensive. Like $300 vs. $85.). He blew me off and insists that I think about it more.
I'm so frustrated! I don't want a hand pump, I want one that is power-operated so my hands don't get tired from pumping all the time. I know the PIS may be louder, but I don't care-- breastfeeding is natural and if they can hear the pump, people are going to have to deal with the fact that I'm pumping. I currently think that I'm going to feel like a cow no matter what-- after all, I'm being pumped to provide milk to another person-- so why on earth would I buy a bump that takes twice as long (as least, since I imagine it will be 2x as long to do each breast, and if my hands get tired from pumping, I am sure it will be more slow than using the PIS)?
My plan is to ignore him. The PIS is on the registry, that's the one I want. I have reasons for wanting it, I'm the one who is going to be pumping, and if he asks me about it (I won't bring it up), I'll just explain my reasons to him and he can deal with it. When milk starts coming out of his nipples, he can pick a fucking pump.
Showing posts with label telling people. Show all posts
Showing posts with label telling people. Show all posts
Monday, September 21, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Inappropriate touching
I met someone the other day-- for the first time-- and she immediately put her hand on my stomach. I've read about that happening and people have told me it happens, but I was still surprised when it did. Why on earth would anyone think that's okay?!?!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Telling work: check!
Monday we had our doctor's appointment, and Tuesday I'd scheduled time with my boss (the CEO) and the Director of HR to let them in on our news. I was nervous. Not because they could do anything about it at this point (hello!) and not because I didn't think they'd be excited. It was mostly because that's a big thing to tell people!
Went into my boss' office. We made small talk for a couple of minutes, then I said, "I don't know exactly how to say this, so I'll just say it. I'm pregnant!" He congratulated me and got all excited and asked me a few (non-invasive, friendly) questions. He's very Christian and loves babies, and his son and daughter-in-law are pregnant right now with what's going to be his first grandchild, so he has baby fever. He told me stories from his wife's pregnancy and offered some fatherly advice. He also said, "I know I've only met Mike once or twice, but if he has any questions or wants to talk to me, please tell him to call me!" It was a very nice offer, but one I don't see us taking him up on. Ha ha.
So that was a relief. I then headed over to HR and had the same conversation with the HR director. I was concerned because I am due to deliver before my 1 year anniversary with my employer, so I'm not eligible for FMLA immediately, but it looks like that's actually going to work in my favor (contrary to what I thought a couple of months ago). I can start on Pregnancy Disability Leave (PDL), which usually runs concurrently with FMLA, but because I'm not eligible for FMLA, I can start on my PDL and then FMLA will kick in on the day of my 1 year anniversary (nearly 4 weeks after I'm due). I can use that and then get into CFRA (California law) baby bonding time, which apparently after I've taken 2 weeks of, I can decide to then use in day or week(s)-long increments. And the HR director said she'd work with me once it gets closer to run some numbers and do some calculations and figure out how to take my time so that I continue to have company-paid insurance (normally, when you're on unpaid leave, you have to pay your own premiums) and continue to accrue PTO (which would then help stretch out my leave)!
Yesterday, Wednesday, I called my team together and told them the news. They were very happy for me and excited, and the employee I'm closest to came up to me after the meeting and said, "I didn't want to do this out there, but I'm a girl, so give me a hug!" We hugged and she asked me questions and we talked about it. She said she thought I might be pregnant. She's very observant! Another of my employees said, "The important thing is not to get stressed, so put it on us. We're here for you," which I thought was the nicest thing ever.
It feels very good to have told people and to be able to have it out in the open now. I just have to keep this bun in my oven so I don't have to tell all these people any sort of bad news.
Went into my boss' office. We made small talk for a couple of minutes, then I said, "I don't know exactly how to say this, so I'll just say it. I'm pregnant!" He congratulated me and got all excited and asked me a few (non-invasive, friendly) questions. He's very Christian and loves babies, and his son and daughter-in-law are pregnant right now with what's going to be his first grandchild, so he has baby fever. He told me stories from his wife's pregnancy and offered some fatherly advice. He also said, "I know I've only met Mike once or twice, but if he has any questions or wants to talk to me, please tell him to call me!" It was a very nice offer, but one I don't see us taking him up on. Ha ha.
So that was a relief. I then headed over to HR and had the same conversation with the HR director. I was concerned because I am due to deliver before my 1 year anniversary with my employer, so I'm not eligible for FMLA immediately, but it looks like that's actually going to work in my favor (contrary to what I thought a couple of months ago). I can start on Pregnancy Disability Leave (PDL), which usually runs concurrently with FMLA, but because I'm not eligible for FMLA, I can start on my PDL and then FMLA will kick in on the day of my 1 year anniversary (nearly 4 weeks after I'm due). I can use that and then get into CFRA (California law) baby bonding time, which apparently after I've taken 2 weeks of, I can decide to then use in day or week(s)-long increments. And the HR director said she'd work with me once it gets closer to run some numbers and do some calculations and figure out how to take my time so that I continue to have company-paid insurance (normally, when you're on unpaid leave, you have to pay your own premiums) and continue to accrue PTO (which would then help stretch out my leave)!
Yesterday, Wednesday, I called my team together and told them the news. They were very happy for me and excited, and the employee I'm closest to came up to me after the meeting and said, "I didn't want to do this out there, but I'm a girl, so give me a hug!" We hugged and she asked me questions and we talked about it. She said she thought I might be pregnant. She's very observant! Another of my employees said, "The important thing is not to get stressed, so put it on us. We're here for you," which I thought was the nicest thing ever.
It feels very good to have told people and to be able to have it out in the open now. I just have to keep this bun in my oven so I don't have to tell all these people any sort of bad news.
Monday, July 6, 2009
"Aww, congrats!"
It has been so fun to see the feedback from people about our news! Mike and I each posted on Facebook-- he "Mike is going to be a dad" and I "Music and Mike and baby makes three"-- and the comments started rolling in. Lots of "congrats," lots of "you're going to be great parents," etc. It was a reminder that there are a lot of people out there who love us, and that's always nice! Our baby is so lucky!
Thump thump
We had a little mix-up at the appointment today-- turns out I wasn't set for a sonogram at all. The receptionist was supposed to give me the info and instructions to schedule an appointment with radiology at 20 weeks for my sonogram, but instead, she gave it to me and told me it was for my appointment today. I was annoyed, but what can you do?
At today's appointment, I got to see a doctor, who I really liked. She's very nice, very personable. Answered all of my questions and then some. I'll get to continue seeing her throughout the rest of my pregnancy, though she most likely won't be there for delivery.
Anyway. At today's appointment, we heard the baby's heart beat! It was ticking away strongly and quickly. Hard to believe there's a baby in my belly!
Today's appointment was the one I was waiting for, and now we can start telling people. Mike's called each of his grandmas-- in fact, he's on the phone with one as I type-- and I'll call the few friends on my list (my best friends know, and most of my other friends will get an email or will see it on Facebook).
At today's appointment, I got to see a doctor, who I really liked. She's very nice, very personable. Answered all of my questions and then some. I'll get to continue seeing her throughout the rest of my pregnancy, though she most likely won't be there for delivery.
Anyway. At today's appointment, we heard the baby's heart beat! It was ticking away strongly and quickly. Hard to believe there's a baby in my belly!
Today's appointment was the one I was waiting for, and now we can start telling people. Mike's called each of his grandmas-- in fact, he's on the phone with one as I type-- and I'll call the few friends on my list (my best friends know, and most of my other friends will get an email or will see it on Facebook).
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