Well, I continue to do a bad job of updating this blog since Michaela was born. It's not intentional. In fact, it's rare that a day goes by that I don't think, "I'll have to blog about that!" Then I just don't quite get there.
Since it's been so long, this will be another roundup style post.
--Michaela is growing and growing and growing! She has little rolls of chub now and looks a bit like the Michelin Man (Girl).
--My father-in-law and step-mother-in-law are coming into town tomorrow. They're nice people and I really like them, so I'm looking forward to it. The only thing I'm not looking forward to is the inevitable clash that will happen between Mike and his step-mom, who thinks he is "over-involved" with the baby and who thinks cloth diapers are weird.
--We're going to CO in April to visit Mike's grandparents. His grandpa was just diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, so we don't know how much time he will have left.
--I pumped in a hair salon yesterday, under my cape. Never thought I'd do that!
--Also on my list of things I never thought I'd do: use the word "vaginally" when talking to a former work associate. When I worked in PR, the place I worked was on this woman reporter's beat. We built a relationship once I left that place that I would describe as friendly, and now she's pregnant. We talked the other day and she was asking about my labor and delivery experience. The word "vagina" isn't a bad one, but it's not something I usually discuss with folks other than my husband and my doctor!
--Work is going well. I'm good at it, and my boss is thrilled to have me on board.
--Mike and I have had sex a few additional times since I last blogged. It's still painful for the most part, but I'm hoping that will get better. I let him touch my breasts for the first time since I had the baby. He said they were "different," but wouldn't tell me how they are different, which is driving me crazy. Oh, and yes, as I feared, I did start leaking milk. By the time we were done, each of us had it on us. It kind of grossed me out.
--My mom continues to make oddball comments that I know she doesn't mean to come out in a "I think you're a bad mom" way, but still somehow manage to. She is constantly going on about how she just holds Michaela all the time when she is babysitting. Finally I said to her, "you know, it's not like I put her in a box when I go home, or in the dog's crate. We hold her all the time, too, even if you only see us bring her over in the car seat."
--Speaking of my crazy parents, my mom finally came over for the first time last week, and only because I was desperate. I had to get on an important conference call for work and didn't have time to drop Michaela off, so my mom came over. She stayed for about a half hour and then went home. My dad still hasn't come by. Neither one of them lives more than 2 miles from my house.
--In fact, my mom watched Michaela for us last Saturday night while Mike and I went out to a friend's birthday dinner. My mom told my dad she'd have the baby, so he went over there and was excited that Michaela was awake. Before that, the only times he'd seen her, she'd been sleeping. I'm not sure why my dad can go over there to see the baby but can't come here, but I find it odd and obnoxious. Luckily, I don't take it personally. It's not about me, it's about how crazy they are.
--I'm getting really nervous about money. Mike's not working as much as I thought he would, and the baby is taking up way more time than he thought she would, so he's not able to actively seek out work int he way we'd anticipated. Meanwhile, we just finished a big, expensive renovation on part of our house, so we're taking money out of savings, but because Mike's not making much and we're living off only my income and income from the rental units, we're not putting anything away in savings. We're just drawing down our cash reserves. I'm not even saving anything for retirement right now. That is killing me.
--In spite of the above point, we're thinking more and more seriously about trying to move in a few years to some place that has better schools and opportunities for Michaela to be friends with neighborhood kids. That's not an option where we are now, unless the 'hood really changes and a lot of Yuppies like us move in.
--I've lost all of my pregnancy weight and then some, but my body has changed shape. My ribcage is bigger, I think, than it was before, because all my bras seem tight in the band. That sucks, because bras are expensive and I hate to have to buy new ones. But they're pretty darn important, so I will have to at some point.
--Every time I go to Target or to Costco, I end up buying stuff for Michaela. It's an addiction! The other day, it was a few $1 books from Target. Not too bad, but still, I shouldn't do that. Have I mentioned I'm worried about money?!?
--I leave in a few days for Sacramento for work. I've arranged to have a mini-fridge in my room to store my milk, and I'm taking a soft-sided cooler to store the milk in on the way home. I've been pumping... hmm, I'm not sure how many times a day... We're giving Michaela 8 ounces of formula a day, both to get her ready for having formula when I'm gone and so I can store some (frozen) milk for her to have while I'm gone. The other day, Michaela went through a period where she wanted the bottle in her mouth all day- really, for hours on end- but didn't eat hardly anything. That day, I was able to put away about 15 ounces of milk. Which is good because her appetite is definitely back now!
--Life is pretty good. I'm really enjoying being a mom, much more than I thought I would, though I sometimes get tired. Michaela is just wonderful and I'm actually at a point now where I've been thinking, "yes, I can have another one." But just one more!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Two months already
It's scary how much has happened in the weeks since I last wrote. There have been a ton of things that I've said to myself, "gotta remember to blog about that," but then I don't have time or don't make it a priority. Too bad, because I know someday I'll look back on these posts and appreciate having captured my thoughts.
Briefly, here are some more.
--Went to Michaela's two-month peds appointment yesterday and the doctor said she has a heart murmur. Not what any mom wants to hear. She said it sounds innocent and it should be fine, but she referred us to the pediatric cardiologist anyway to have an echo cardiogram.
--Michaela got her first shots. I was upset, as was she, but she did great. I feel lucky she doesn't cry much. We really have a good baby.
--She's huge! The pediatrician said she never would have known Michaela was born a month early. She's in the 97% percentile on weight, 90% percentile on length, and 75% in head size, but the doctor stressed that it's all proportionate.
--Mike and I had sex last night for the first time since the baby was born. I felt like I was being ripped apart, in spite of the fact that my OB said I am all healed up. I guess it goes without saying that the sex wasn't that great for me.
--Mike and I had been fighting for weeks on end, but we seem to be in a better place now. In the thick of it, I was thinking obsessively about divorce, which friends told me would happen. But that didn't make it better.
--Work is good. I've resigned myself to having to work, so I figure I might as well make the best of it. I really like my boss and that helps, and it's nice to be at home. Actually, here's how I put it in an email a couple of weeks ago to a friend:
Being back at work sucks. Well, no, that's not fair. It's complicated. I'm trying to remind myself that this arrangement is MUCH better than my previous one in terms of what it means for my family. And that's absolutely true. This morning, I got up at 8:30, turned on my computer, and was at work. On my lunch break, I helped Mike give Michaela a bath. I'm doing laundry as I type this. All of those things are great.
On the other hand, I'm totally jealous of Mike, who will start taking Michaela to baby sign language and outdoor education classes for 0-12-month-olds next week. I'll be at my desk, working. That's really hard.
Work-wise, it's okay. I didn't ever really get my bearings before, so it's sort of like starting a new job all over again. I miss being in charge of a team (and I had a great team). This job is much more technician, in spite of my director title. But that's probably for the best, since I do want to be able to spend time with the baby without being stressed out about work.
--The baby classes are great. I have made time in my schedule to be able to go to at least one of the classes each week, and that helps me feel less jealous and less disconnected. Gotta love having a flexible schedule!
--My weight loss has plateaued. I was hoping to drop more weight, but I think I'm going to have to exercise to make that happen. Ha ha.
--I have to go to a conference in Sacramento in early March for four days. Mike and I fought about it quite a bit, because I wanted him and the baby to go along and he didn't want to, but we've decided he's not going to go. I'm actually looking forward to going and being able to sleep (even though I have to get up to pump, I won't have to do any feedings or diaper changes in the middle of the night, and I can go to bed early, I hope).
--I'll have the baby all to myself in April for a weekend. That should be interesting. And we're going to Denver to visit Mike's parents and grandparents (his grandpa was just diagnosed with cancer) later that month.
--Everything is going well. I'm really enjoying being a mom. And I love Michaela like nobody's business.
--Parents are hilarious. My mom is totally against breastfeeding. She's convinced formula is better. My favorite quote on the subject: "I know you read on the internet that breastfeeding is best, but..." As if I read it on a website that also claims Elvis is alive and living in Boca! She's also not keen on cloth diapers. But she's watched Michaela twice now and did a great job (which I never doubted), and I'm appreciative that she's willing to do it.
--Neither of my parents have been over to see the baby. If we stop by, they're happy to see her. And they always ask about her. But they haven't come over. It's really weird, even for them.
I'll end here so I can get back to work, but hope to return to a regular posting schedule soon!
Briefly, here are some more.
--Went to Michaela's two-month peds appointment yesterday and the doctor said she has a heart murmur. Not what any mom wants to hear. She said it sounds innocent and it should be fine, but she referred us to the pediatric cardiologist anyway to have an echo cardiogram.
--Michaela got her first shots. I was upset, as was she, but she did great. I feel lucky she doesn't cry much. We really have a good baby.
--She's huge! The pediatrician said she never would have known Michaela was born a month early. She's in the 97% percentile on weight, 90% percentile on length, and 75% in head size, but the doctor stressed that it's all proportionate.
--Mike and I had sex last night for the first time since the baby was born. I felt like I was being ripped apart, in spite of the fact that my OB said I am all healed up. I guess it goes without saying that the sex wasn't that great for me.
--Mike and I had been fighting for weeks on end, but we seem to be in a better place now. In the thick of it, I was thinking obsessively about divorce, which friends told me would happen. But that didn't make it better.
--Work is good. I've resigned myself to having to work, so I figure I might as well make the best of it. I really like my boss and that helps, and it's nice to be at home. Actually, here's how I put it in an email a couple of weeks ago to a friend:
Being back at work sucks. Well, no, that's not fair. It's complicated. I'm trying to remind myself that this arrangement is MUCH better than my previous one in terms of what it means for my family. And that's absolutely true. This morning, I got up at 8:30, turned on my computer, and was at work. On my lunch break, I helped Mike give Michaela a bath. I'm doing laundry as I type this. All of those things are great.
On the other hand, I'm totally jealous of Mike, who will start taking Michaela to baby sign language and outdoor education classes for 0-12-month-olds next week. I'll be at my desk, working. That's really hard.
Work-wise, it's okay. I didn't ever really get my bearings before, so it's sort of like starting a new job all over again. I miss being in charge of a team (and I had a great team). This job is much more technician, in spite of my director title. But that's probably for the best, since I do want to be able to spend time with the baby without being stressed out about work.
--The baby classes are great. I have made time in my schedule to be able to go to at least one of the classes each week, and that helps me feel less jealous and less disconnected. Gotta love having a flexible schedule!
--My weight loss has plateaued. I was hoping to drop more weight, but I think I'm going to have to exercise to make that happen. Ha ha.
--I have to go to a conference in Sacramento in early March for four days. Mike and I fought about it quite a bit, because I wanted him and the baby to go along and he didn't want to, but we've decided he's not going to go. I'm actually looking forward to going and being able to sleep (even though I have to get up to pump, I won't have to do any feedings or diaper changes in the middle of the night, and I can go to bed early, I hope).
--I'll have the baby all to myself in April for a weekend. That should be interesting. And we're going to Denver to visit Mike's parents and grandparents (his grandpa was just diagnosed with cancer) later that month.
--Everything is going well. I'm really enjoying being a mom. And I love Michaela like nobody's business.
--Parents are hilarious. My mom is totally against breastfeeding. She's convinced formula is better. My favorite quote on the subject: "I know you read on the internet that breastfeeding is best, but..." As if I read it on a website that also claims Elvis is alive and living in Boca! She's also not keen on cloth diapers. But she's watched Michaela twice now and did a great job (which I never doubted), and I'm appreciative that she's willing to do it.
--Neither of my parents have been over to see the baby. If we stop by, they're happy to see her. And they always ask about her. But they haven't come over. It's really weird, even for them.
I'll end here so I can get back to work, but hope to return to a regular posting schedule soon!
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