Where you at?

I hate that expression. But this post is all about where I am with my pregnancy.

I'm in hell!

Being pregnant is, hands down, the most difficult thing I've ever had to do. At first, I didn't feel like it was true. I felt the same as always. No way there's a baby in my belly!

That quickly faded, though. I began having morning, noon and night sickness. No vomiting, just really intense nausea and a lot of dry heaving. I became incredibly fatigued. I would drag myself to work in the morning (and keep in mind that I work 90 miles from my house, so I have to leave an hour and a half before I need to be at work), stay as long as I could, spend another 90 minutes in the car, then come home and immediately get in bed. I also had to leave several meetings to go dry heave in the bathroom. Nice.

It's gotten a little better in the last few weeks. I'm trying to do all the things they suggest you do when you have bad morning sickness. I take my prenatal vitamins at night so I won't feel sick all day. I eat a lot of small meals and try to keep something in my stomach at all times. Those things help, but come with their own downsides, like waking up feeling sick in the middle of the night and like feeling like a cow being turned into veal.

Normally, I love to eat. But I'm so sick of eating now! So sick of food! Nothing sounds good, nothing tastes good (or not for very long). My sense of smell has become really sensitive and each time I open the fridge, I was to throw up from the smell. And it's not like our fridge is gross and smells bad!

The last few days, I've had a disgusting, sweet, metallic taste in my mouth that won't go away. It's not a hygiene thing, I brush my teeth all the time. Sucking on mints helps, while I'm actually doing it, but the minute the mint is gone, the taste is back worse than ever. I've read that happens to some women, but no one really knows why.

Some days, I have a really hard time breathing and find myself wheezing a bit. Today is one of those days. I didn't feel like I could catch my breath. I laid on the floor of my office for a while, but that didn't help.

I don't know how far along I am, so I'm not sure how much longer these things will go on. Much of what I'm experiencing goes away for most women after the first trimester is over. I'm hoping when we go in for our first prenatal appointment on Monday, they'll tell me I'm very close to being in my second trimester and I'll start feeling better soon!